Josh Turner -The Longer the Waiting

I couldn't put this on my last post. But this song just hits the spot. It's hard to listen to, but I absolutley LOOOVE it! I hope you enjoy too!

Just a thought..

Tonight was Den's pre-deployment meeting. There were a ton of people there! I thought a submarine would hold like maybe 12 people. There was at least 4 dozen guys there. Most with their wives and kids. I have to admit I was a bit intimidated. But I went because I thought they'd provide all the answers to my questions. A lot of the stuff they shared was good, useful information. But some of it was kind of useless. But I'm glad I went none the less. Man, I can't belive in a little under 3 weeks, he'll be leaving again. One thing they said was that they'd be leaving either the 6th or the 7th. (Which this coming from the chief, you'd think he'd know for sure what day it is. Being this close to deployment.) Then he flies out of the country (which where he is going is "classified" information...I'm too nosey, I want to know where he is, how long he's going to be there, what he's doing, and if he's ok. So this will be trying for me to not know anything) And will be returning somewhere around the 18th-20th of August. I'm dreading this.



I can honestly say that being a military wife, has opened my eyes to the worldly events happening. I thought I was thankful for a free country before, Now I'm quadruple, maybe even more thankful for the things that our country provides us. But this by far, is the hardest part of my life. It's so easy to be supportive to my husband. Because I love him so much. But at the same time while I'm trying to be strong, I'm dieing inside. I don't want to break down in front of him. Because I know that as much as I hate him being gone, he hates it worse. I want to be the strong wife. Is there such a thing as a strong wife? I want him to be able to leave and not worry about me, or anything back home. I feel like I don't have any right feeling the way I do, because there are people who are away from their families a lot longer than 4 months. But, when I log on to FB, and I see my friends complaining because their husbands/boyfriends are gone for a few nights or a week, it really hurts my feelings because, well they're gone a week, they're guarenteed to see them in a week or a few days... I can't even talk to my husband for a couple months. I can e-mail him all I want, but being under water they have no way of getting them until the sub surfaces after a month or two. And then MAYBE he'll get the chance to respond.



It's very important to me that no one thinks I'm trying to get people to feel bad, throw a pitty party. Because that is so not the case. This life style is so hard, and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone. But, in the midst of it all, I often find myself questioning if I'm cut out for this. But a thought just came to me. If this is what we have to do, then there is really no other person I'd rather do this for. Den and I, we are the lucky ones. Because even though I've only been with him 2 1/2 months out of this whole year, we get eternity. Which in the skeem of things makes this all worth while. But for now, I'll keep my happy face for him. and while he's gone I pray that the time goes by quick. And I have to thank my family and friends for their support. I loove everyone! <3

The Adventures of moving!!

Since I can't sleep I might as well update the blog. I actually started and finished it on our Word program. Then went to copy and paste, and guess what??? It doesn't work! GRR! But this gives me a chance to look back to the past few weeks! :)

**I'LL POST UP DATED PICS SOON!!**


I have to start out by saying how nice it FINALLY is to have Den with me again! What a blessing! Ok, now to my story. (its more like a short novel. So bare with me..) Wednesday morning (the day before we actually move) Den and I woke up bright and early, to start out our day of packing. Starting with getting our Budget truck. It was HUGE! I didn't think there was any way possible that we could fill that thing. Since Dennis is too prideful to ask for help. We got to the storage unit and realized we forgot to bring the dolley with us. I say THANK GOODNESS for good friends! I called our good friend Spencer, and he picked up the dolley and helped us pack the truck. It went by fast! I was soo glad! Then on to Den's parents. I was thinking we didn't have all that much stuff there 2 dressers and mostly clothes. But it took forever! Probably because while I was packing, Den was making the calls to his boat, and doing the packing from the garage. All this stuff I didn't know he had!


About 2 + hours later we were finally finished! But we wanted to avoid goodbye's for a while longer so headed to my moms and packed there. A week or so before my grandma passed away, she showed Krysta, and I what she wanted to go where. (Coincidence??) So I had a dresser and a side board and CLOTHES galore, and random odds and ends. Man, for two people, we sure were scatter around! ;) so we finally finished everything about 8 o'clock that night. Now, for the part we weren't looking forward to! A week earlier, we said 'bye' to his brother and sister inlaw and their family. Then his sister a few days before. So it was on to our parent's and my sister and our friends. It was hard to say bye to Dens parent's. I'd grown quite attached since we'd been there. Ofcourse, his mom cried. But nothing too bad. So we left and got to my moms and I was a mess. We decided to stay there because it was 15 less miles we had to drive the next day. My mom was a trooper and held it together. Which I'm thankful for. I know she was having a hard time but I think it would've been much harder to say goodbye with her bawling! So once we ate, we went to the Hirschi's. I don't think they'll ever know how much I love and aprreciate them! I was at their house literally almost everyday since Den left. And as much as I'm sure they wanted to give me the boot, they still invited me over! Sara and I had talked about how hard this goodbye would be. But to my knowledge she didn't cry either. Thankgoodness! I cannot stress enough how blessed we are to have such loving, caring, kind, friends!


We left there, and I bawled more. We went home and slept about 3-4 hours and was up and ready by 7:30. Enough to see my mom off, and say bye to my sister. The hard part was over, now on to a 15 hr drive. We drove about 9-10 hrs on Thursday. And stopped in Oregon. Man we were beat! We slept 13 hrs! Then off again we were! But not before fueling. I got out of the car, and did the normal, pop the the lid, slide my card, and a guy takes my card. I was shocked! I didn't know what the heck was happening! Until he told me it's a law in Oregon to have someone pump your gas. Well at least I wasn't being robbed! haha! The drive was actually kind of boring. Really flat and nothing. At least in Idaho we have mountains, farms, and other things. Not Oregon, or the first part of Washington. Once we got into Washington far enough, I was in awe! This place is HUGE! We finally got to base! With 2 hours to spare before we have to meet with the housing people. So Den pulled off, and when I got out to see what he was doing, I saw the car that was being pulled behind the truck, on the dolley the two front tires straps were completley off! We made it that far without the car falling off! Someone put in a good word for us because that's a miracle! We still had to register the cars for base, so after an hour and a half Den finished fixing it. Then on to registering the cars. We can only register one car. Because I accidently threw the new registration away, mistaking it for the old one.

(Sorry if I'm blabbing) But I have to explain how this move works. The Navy pays us to move, or they'll move us. But us having cars, they wouldn't pull them. So we had to do the move ourselves. And when we picked up the truck we had to weigh it empty. And now we have to weigh it full. NOTE TO SELF: DEN AND I DO NOT MAKE A GOOD MOVING TEAM! NEXT TIME WE HAVE THEM MOVE US! So this is why the car is still attached, and we didn't take it off. It took Den many, many, times explaining that to me. But we made it to the house! I was in LOVE! Its so nice and roomy for the 2 of us! So after signing paper-work, we had to hit the road to find a weigh station. And our luck is, if we didn't have bad luck, we'd have no luck. So the two that were close to us were closed. His LPO (Leading petty officer) found one a little closer than the one I found. It was still an hour and a half away but we got the job done! HALLELUJAH! Then we get back to base FOR THE NIGHT, about 8. We still have plenty of time to do some un-packing. Well that was until we got stuck between two cement round-abouts. GREAT! Den started to un-do the car and we'd just take the dang thing off now. But we were told we had to wait for the base police to come help us. So we waited for 15 + minutes, and for them to come tell us to do what we origionally had planned to do! by the time we got done it was a quarter to 10. I was ready for the night to be DONE! When we got back home, we went to let the dogs in and our new little blood hound had blood running down her face. Javi, apparently doesn't like her too well. So we cleaned her up, un packed the bed and slept in the living room. And the next day came too soon! We spent most of Saturday morning un-packing, and getting our DTV installed.


The instalation guy was super nice. But when we have installation people like that we have to get them on and take them off base. So we led him off and came home to one dog! We had to sperate them because of the night before. We didn't want any repeats! So we looked around the back yard and saw the guy had left the gate open. THANKS DTV guy! Of the two it had to be the new one, without the collar on. Den searched while I went to get my uncle and his wife to bring them on base. We planned to have them over for dinner. But instead they helped us look for Sophie. The good thing about being on base is she can't get to any busy highways or anything. So I was hoping she'd be ok. My mom called me on Sunday and said that she found a guy online who lived in our area that found a puppy. So I called. But it wasn't her. He told me to go to the Kitsap Hummane clinic, and then to call the base police. So Monday morning we were at the clinic and no little Sophie! So Den had to register his guns with the base office and we got a special escort to the office. I asked the base cop if he had heard or seen anything. About an hour after we left he was knocking on the front door and said his chief's daughter had found a puppy, to follow him and he'd take me over to the house. So I did and there she was! Safe and sound! What's even crazy is she was across the street in a different building but to drive there its about 4 blocks away. So I was relieved! They took such good care of her! Such a happy ending to our miserable, first weekend here!

"Go forth with Faith

I'm writing this blog for my journaling tonight. Tomorrow we start the pack! I can't belive it's already here. For the past 3 weeks, I've been decorating our new apartment, with the pictures they sent me. And then putting things together on paper. I just really want this place to feel like "home". And I'm hoping that with decorating I'll be busy enough I won't notice being so far away. I do have to say, that I am so beyond extatic to start a new chapter in our life. For me this will be the furthest away from home I've ever lived. Den too, but he's been on a mission for 2 years, and lived alone for 2 years. This is really starting to freak me out! I love Den so much, I know this will be a good move for us. But it's always the unknown that gets me. Well, I think it gets everyone.

He's Here!

So I've been SO excited to get Den home with me! On Friday, as we all know, I was so, so, so, excited!! But I thought I was going to have a heart attack waiting for him! He was to fly in at 11:11 p.m.. We were there at quarter to. And waited almost an HOUR!!! I swear that he was never coming! But the moment I saw him, was emotional. Not only for me, but for everyone who was there. I was sooo happy to have our family there to support Dennis. I know it made him fell great! It felt like it had been years since I've seen him. Not months.

It took everything I had to not run to him!

This has to be the sweetest picture we have! I LOOOVE it!!

On Saturday, we went to Mike and Lori's to spend the night with them. Our niece had a piano recital. I was impressed at the talent those kids have! It was great! After the recital, We went back to the house and hung out. It was nice to see Den and his brother and the family bond again. The one thing I remind myself of constantly, is I'm not the only one who needs him. And needs to spend time with him. Sometimes its a hard reality because I want to be selfish and keep him to myself. But its welll worth it to see him so happy, and them happy too!

Later, we played some rockband with Mike, Lori, and Jean...Yep, Jean had a part in it too! She sang 'Pretty Woman'. She did a great job, except she didn't sing loud enough for the game to register her voice. It was so fun to be with the family agian!

I am SOOO thankful, to have him back again! It's been a long time comming! I LOOOOOOVE him so so so much! :)

THE TIME HAS ARRIVED!!!

TOOODAY is the day! I wasn't going to blog until we got home. But I decided I would so that I can have todays feelings for my 'journal'.

I can't belive today I am going to pick my husband up! I can't get around the fact that it's just not a visit. A visit for 3 days at the most. This is the day I've been waiting for since July 19th (the day he left). I get to be a wife again! I am so lucky to have such a loving husband! I couldn't sleep at all for the past 3 or 4 nights. I was too excited!

What I'm most thankful for is our family and friends who've supported us from the begining! I could've never stayed so sane if it wasn't for them. Our parents, who took such good care of me when he was gone. My sister, and his brother and sister in law for calling me to ' just make sure I'm doing OK'. The rest of our families who make sure to let us know how much they are proud of him. I'm SO proud of him. And couldn't be more thankful for such a loving, handsome husband!!! Time to go get ready!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll try to post pics soon from the airport! Love everyone!

Just a small, random, post. Now that Christmas is over, I just have January to look forward to. I cannot wait for Den to get home. Before he left, I pictured this time away from eachother a lot easier. I find that some days are easier than others. But overall, this is by far the worst expierence I've ever been through so far being married. I don't expect it to get any easier. Sometimes I question if I'm cut out to be a military wife. I want to be the best wife to my husband that I can. Because he deserves it. But, I'm scared of the future, being alone. With family so far away, from everyone that I love. This isn't the easiest life but as long as I can be with Den I am a happy camper. I will make the most of our time together, and when he's gone on diployment I know that my family and friends are just a phone call away, and a skype away! ;) I am love with him, and look up to him with everything he does!!

I found these poems and want to share them:

Dear Lord,
A Navy wife I choose to be,
My husband's job to keep me free.
He must sail to foreign lands;
While he's gone, hold thou my hands,
When worries seem too much to bear;
Embrace me with thy loving care.
If days are boring, and nights too long,
Keep me father from all the wrong.
When I am weak and torn by fears,
Please father, dry my helpless tears.
You know indeed that I am frail;
Help me to send him Cheerful mail.
And as my lonely vigil stand,
My prayer is this: Please hold my hand.
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Dear Lord, give me greatness of heart to see,
The difference between duty and his love for me,

Give me a task to do each day,
To help pass the time while he's away.

Give me the understanding, so that I may know,
That when duty calls he must go;

And, Dear Lord, When he goes out to sea,
Please bring him home safely to me.
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I have to say, I am thankful for the man I have. For the unconditional love he has for me. Even through all my imperfections, and faults, he is there for me. I adore him, and will forever be thankful for this sacrafice he has made for us. Because as hard as it is for me to be away from him, I know it's just as hard for him. I pray, that I may be positive and supportive and whatever else he needs from me. I hope I can fullfil those emotions for him!